Don't You Think I'm Beautiful?
With Blood Escaping My Wrists?



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Name: Caitlin
Location: Pumpkin Land, Illinois, United States
Birthday: 6/7/1989
Gender: Female


Interests: Icons!!
Expertise: uh... i have an expertise?
Occupation: Artist
Industry: Art


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Member Since: 4/26/2005

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Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Hi. My name is Caitlin and most of the icons and quotes are NOT MINE. I do not take credit for any of them that i dont label as mine.

WARNING: This page contains graphic images and suicidal thoughts. If you have a problem with these things, please DO NOT scroll down. And please don't leave comments bashing my site. I warned you that these images and quotes are here.

</3 Updates:


12/3/05 - Ack. Sorry for the lack of updates. A lot has been going on. I doubt I will be updating much for about 2 months cause I'm moving. But I will get more icons and quotes up as soon as possible!

11/14/05 - Finally ya'll comment! Ha ha! Lol. I added some new icons (in music, love, and other) and quotes.

10/18/05 - Still don't have 10 comments... Hm... no new icons or quotes either... I need those comments...

8/31/05 - Okay... I'm not updating anymore until I get at least 10 comments!

8/19/05 - New layout.

8/18/05 - New icons and quotes.

8/17/05 - REVAMP!!! Im updating and changing everything so it might take a little while to get some new stuff up, but have fun!

</3 Pick Upz:

 



 

</3 My Quotes

the slits on my wrist bleed the poison from your lips.

im just a fucked up girl, living a fucked up life, in a fucked up world, with a fucking knife

hurt myself today, to see if i still live

i slit my wrist open, just to feel

kill me while i still believe that we were meant to be

S.O.S. save our souls

people call me emo, people call me goth, people call me punk, people call me poser, i call me me

you dont know me, so dont fucking judge what you dont understand

im trying to quit... doesnt that count?

</3 Other Quotes

She closes her eyes,
as her makeup  runs ..
He got the best of her`* 

It seems funny to me,
How Fucked things can be,
Everytime
I get ahead
I feel more dead.

 

So sweep away the sand & dry the
ocean & just pack the moon & stars up in
a cardboard box & stop the clocks from
chiming & block the sun from shining &
paint the sky a deeper shade of blue
because my world is over without you..</3

 

Go right ahead, rip my heart out, stomp on it and throw around, punch it, smash it into a million pieces then ask me if im okay

True romance is dead, I shot it in the chest then in the head

 

I was holding on hanging by a thread,

Clinging to 3 words you said,

But words are meaningless in your absence.

 

in a time of love
in a time of pain
as we bleed
as we choke
the rest of the world watches

 

your slick.
a slick and polished mess.

 

your type of beauty
is born to fade;one
of lust and of shame

 

i smile and make you think i'm happy
i talk and make you think i love me
i laugh so you don`t see me cry
i look at you & hide the [PAIN] inside
i feel myself dying but you see me survive

the tears take control ; it's addicting ; but she
hides them & tells herself it'll be ok ; but that's the
part that hurts the most ; it's a lie ; all of it was ;
everything was ; the taste of tears is sadly not
new to her

She’s fed up with the way people treat her
She looks up to the sky and screams
[
Enough is enough]
She falls on her knees
And says
goodbye to her life,
To everything she once loved
Pull the
trigger, and the mask falls to the floor

all those scars on her arms.
don't worry.
she says they're little notes to remind her
how many times you broke her heart

Dead in her mind
And cold to the bone
She opened her eyes
And saw she was alone

wipe a tear, crack a smile
you've just committed
the perfect crime
faked them all
they dont know
you're dying inside

she has everything and more
yet she still brakes down in tears
every night.
i guess there really is--
more than meets the eyes<3

suck in my stomach.
pinch my waist.
spend hours touching up my ugly face.
all these things i fucking do..
don`t make a difference.
im not perfect enough for you <3

These bandages cover more
than scrapes, cuts & bruises
These bandages cover my
regrets & mistakes.

I`m dying & I feel so alone
The lights are on & I wish I was home
My lips are screaming pretty nothings
My ears are bleeding for want of words
Fuck words I need actions
Hope has left me fucking shattered

fall down and i cant
pick myself up off the
ground. i see the
fucking catastrophe
and it's right in front
of me.

i heard about your screaming
message and how it reeked of
your indifference. it bleeds
horizontal straight from your wrist.

we are basic in diqguise. we are
stuck in these moments of time.
will we let go and let the past
pass us goodbye again?

annihilation, exuberation, feel it
running on and on. i've broken down.

hold your knife against my throat,
cut me deeper. feel the blood
drip down your arm, darling.

Could this be out of line?

To say you’re the only one

Breaking me down like this

You’re the only one

I would take a shot on

Keep me hanging on

So contagiously

 

There's a girl in a cage making love to a switchblade

There's a man behind bars milking abandoned cars.

There's a priest in shackles building bombs out of bibles.

And piano wire vines and the men in the pines

That spin round and round and round and round and round

 

Words [are] bullets and can kill just as much as guns

 

I bite my tounge everytime I see you because blood in my mouth is better than tears in my eyes

 

she pulled the trigger & her mask fell
to the floor with a shatter as everyone
watched

 

not even make`up could make her
look   beautiful  ..  because   real
beauty is  lovinq yourself & that`s
somethinq she could never do <|3

 

dreaming away the pain

finding myself high above the world

reality seems so far away

why did it have to be this way?

as i wipe away the blood

i clean my battle scars

thinking about the dreams i dreamt

while he was tearing me apart

  

and i`ll let the words kill me.
because truth is..
i`m already dead

 

The sharper the edge the cleaner the wound, so
 ill be keeping it dull tonight for I deserve to be hurt.

Cause theres a fine fucking line between love and hate
That we cross at least once of every goddamn day
And while you say you fucking love me you still push me away
You tie me at the wrists so that you cant be saved

RAPE ME..
so that my blood can fall from my body in pretty colors

behind my smile is a frown
behind my laugh is a cry
behind my bracelet is a new cut
look at who i pretend to be, it isnt me

&& he takes the razor out of her hands and whispers: "every cut to your wrist is a stab to my heart."

the scars on my wrist are proof, not that im weak....but that people like you do indeed exist

i don't cut to forget someone, i cut to numb the feeling i have. the bad feeling insdie of me. i dont't cut for attention but for the lack of attention and nurture i was given as a child...and you thought you had probelms

Then they tease her,
Make her cry
She starves herself & commits suicide,
And even after all this
They persist--then wonder why

youd think the 'hardxcore' kids are stronger because they put a gun to their heard. but it takes one damn strong 'emo' person to put a gun to your head and pull the trigger

i thought i was a happy person, until that moment you ended it all, with one word. who know that one word can lead to my level of depression where you cut, write poems and draw...?

i look in the mirror at a person i don't want to see....its me. i was never too fond of myself. people said i was pretty but its a lie. i look up at myself in the mirror and i roll up my sleeves and run the razor down my wrist...all because i hate myself...

ME

you think the black nail polish, the cuts, the dark hair, the screamo music is all a fase
go ahed, think oh me as going with the 'in' thing

in reality im me
whether that is a goth, a prep, a slut, an emo
im me, im not always proud of this fact

im not the pretty or the smart one
your comments twords me make me think less of myself

which is why im the way that i am
not because its the cool thing to do, but because its just simply me

I sit here crying in the dark and somehow u know I’m scared 2 death so u call me up but it's 2 late...I already chose my fate

you say its all in my head
the scars, the pain, the drugs
all in my head

dont care, no one does
i may cut and take pills to make it through the day
but it is not in my head

you say you want proof
fine look at these wrists and youll know whats going on

you say its all in my head
well, theres your proof

----

you made me like this
the silent, unconfident one

the poem writing one
the cutting one who stays up late at night to write depressing poems
all with one word, who knew?

So here`s to teenage romance, & never knowing why it hurts like hell

Waking up is hard to do when no one loves you..

ii blame >myself< for everythiing
              that had gone wrong

yesterday you asked me why i was crying .. &
i told you i didnt know, but it was a lie;
the truth is you were holding her to keep her warm ..
while i was freezing deep down inside

""i want a boy that will stay with me for

always

He'll know you can never say I love you too

many times

But he knows not to say it if he doesn't mean it with

all his heart

He'll tell me we're like Corey and Topanga

He'll give me his favorite sweatshirt

He'll make me a Build-a-Bear

And he wont care about how silly he looks being in a store full of 2nd graders

Because he knows it would be special to me

He'll stay home with me and watch The Notebook

And he'll tell me he loved it  even though he didn't

and the only person he would ever watch it with would be me

.He'll.call.me.at.3am.and.ask.me.what.i'm.doing.

He'll tell me he couldn't fall asleep because he was thinking about me, and he needed to hear my voice

He cant walk next to me without holding my hand

And he always whispers something sweet in my ear
He'll take me to a concert to see his favorite band

And he wont get embarrassed to tell me he loves me in front of his friends

When I cry he'll tell me I'm too beautiful to and he'll kiss every tear

He'll always make me feel better because he knows the perfect things  to say to me

All of his friends will know we're in love because he'll talk about me to them

When we're walking together he'll stop and pick up a flower and put it behind my ear

He'll tell me I'm a princess

And treat me like one too

He'll love everything about me and tell me that I'm perfect

We always end up laughing about silly fights

We wont get mad for making fun of each other because we crack up at every bit of it

Even if we're a million years old, butterflies will still go crazy inside of me

Every time he kisses me

He'll tell me he'd die without me

He'll surprise me by bringing me over my favorite food when I'm having a bad day

When we go out for ice cream, he'll put some on my nose then I'll put some all over his face

And we just never stop laughing

He's interested in everything I say, and he always cares about it

He'll buy me jewelry and bouncy balls from vending machines

              He wont stop playing until he's won me a stuffed animal

He'll take walks with me in the snow, and we'll catch TsnowflakesT on our tongues

He doesn't even like snow, but I
love it

Every time I even hear his name, it takes my breath away

And when I hear him speak, I'll  fall in love  all over again

He'll pay for me all the time even though I never want him to but I can never win

But with him I could never lose either

Because everything about him is just so wonderful

Perfect

I'll be his everything

And he'll be even more to me""

Y"Dose he love me"
"I dont like her"
"i feel like ill never be with him"
"i dont think ill be with her"
"I cut for him"
"she dose wat for me?!"
"Im crazy for him"
"She is crazy"
"My friends all crowd around him"
"my friends tell me about her"
"i know he hates me"
"i think i like her"
"I wanna kill my self"
"I hope she dosent do anythng crazy"
4 dys later the poor girl just couldnt take life anylonger with out him....
"why did it have to be like this just god let me pull this trigger"
he died by her side

My Eyes Hurt From Crying
My Heart Aches From Trying
My Wrist Burn From Cutting
&& In The End ... I Still Have
N   O   T   H    I     N     G

                I'll Be Just Fine . . Pretending I'm Not.
                              ©©©                
                                   I'mFarFromLonely&It'sAllThatI'veGot.

She knew better, but her crazy heart didn't..
It always broke, no matter how hard she tried to
protect it

Not all scars show, not all wounds heal. Sometimes
                       you can¡¦t always see the
pain someone feels

Don't call me obsessed when i'm only
scared of losing the best thing that's ever
happened to me..

teardrops fall from those pretty little eyes
                 kind of hard to move on when you only told lies
                    shes breakin down, everyones fading
                its been so long and shes tired of waiting

labels are for cans, not people

`m not afraid of happy endings,
i`m afraid my life won`t work that way.

-::- I N.e.V.e.R sToPpEd -::-
:.*.:.FeELiNg.:.*.:.
-*FoR -*YoU*-
-::-I juSt StOpPed LeTtInG iT sHoW-::-

 so fragile--she cant even see her [own] beauty.

i can't forgive you for leaving until i
forgive myself for letting you leave

Don't call me obsessed when i'm only
scared of losing the best thing that's ever
happened to me..

just know that i will remember you if
living was the hardest part.

if you were here, i'd never have a fear.
so go on live your life.. but i miss you
more than i did yesterday.

*~Add a cut for
Every mile
Say you'll love me
For awhile
Fake a smile
Learn to breath
Hold on tight
When you wanna scream~*

Scar’s are like tattoo’s but with better stories

Love is the red of the rose on your coffin door
What's life like, bleeding on the floor

I should pin my heart to my back
So when I walk away,
You can see it
breaking

i smile and make you think i'm happy
i talk and make you think you love me
i laugh so you don`t see me
cry
i look at you & hide the PAiN inside
i feel myself dying but you see me survive

Before i load the gun // let me write your name on the bullet.
That way when they find my body // They'll know you were the last thing
                  (¯`·._)
That went through my head

Try feeling my ((pain))
Try running thru my ((veins))
Try being the knife that slit thru my ((wrist))
Try being the anger thats in my ((fist))
Try lookin thru these ((eyes))
Try listening to all those ((lies))
Try being me and you'll ((see))
Why I don't care what ((you))
Think of ((me))

Let's destroy each other..
'cause we're too kewl for love lines..
&& soft kisses over cheap wine.
Smoke me baby, like your last cigarette.
and whisper to me..
say .. "You'll never forget"
Could you break my ♥heart♥ a little more?
I shove my body up against yours..
&&and&&
kiss me like you mean it.


Take this razor and cut it deep
leave a trail of red blood
make me cry and make me scream
i love it when you hurt me baby. X3

x__Yeah, i'm okay.. in an "everything's fucked up" kinda way.__x

The most beautiful words // paint // the most horrific scene.

you break my heart into a million pieces.. and you say its because i deserve better...?

Beautiful girl with pretty eyes
A hidden world of hurt and lies..

Let's keep holding on
So we dont fall apart.
Let's make love tonight
like we never had a broken heart
♥♥♥♥♥

X____x sometimes you gotta smile and walk away x____X
X___x hold your tears in and pretend you're okay x___X

sometimes the ||pain|| is too much to bare
sometimes if you dont watch your back, it'll cost you
sometimes you wonder who the fuck would care
| x | [ ( I f  t h e y  l o s t  y o u ) ] | x |

I wake up and think dreams are real. I sleep so I don't have to feel. </3.

So spill my blood SO SPILL MY BLOOD
Midnight skies turn scarlet red
Say "so long" say "goodnight" and just hold out your hand
To catch me if I fall into the night....

&& the worst way to miss someone
is to be sittinq right beside them ;; `'
knowing that you can't have them</3

I'D RATHER DIE ; THAN SPEND THIS NIGHT HERE

W I T H O U T  Y O U .

 

I'll rip my heart out, and give it to you
It does me no good when
every
beat screams your name
Oh, it causes me
too much pain.

My life is now chaos. And your tongue breeds deceit. Wake from this nightmare

Cut my wrists, break my heart.  It's all the same to me

Tears come and go but it's the memories that kill you

Please, push the knife in a little farther, it hasn't pierced my heart just yet

What doesn't kill you only makes you wanna die

Love isn't giving him the power to break your heart, it's trusting him not to.

Guess I don't trust you.

Im just a small girl in a big world
trying to find someone to love </3

So give me all your poison
And give me all your pills
And give me all your hopeless hearts
And make me ill
You are running after something
That you will never kill
If this is what you want
Then fire at will N

She stood in the pouring rain
SCREAMING HIS NAME
as he slowly walked away <|3

Love songs suck & fairy tales aren't true
& happy ending
hollywood is not for me and you
so add it up & break it down
It's not that hard to figure
out
Your crazy
& I'm crazy about you

I l.o.v.e. the taste of your blackened lips.

you say you hate me and you say you
dont care
but you’re just a two faced liar..
or maybe
I'm just wanting you to be...

When everything feels like the movies
you'll
bleed just to know your alive <//3

i'm lying here
and
my thoughts
are choking on you, my dear

every 1 has a WEAKNESS ..
     i have two: everything you say
                        and everything you do

I know I'm made of mistakes, disappointments, and failures, but I bet you there's a part of me that's actually worth keeping.

if i say im okay...im lying to u like u lied to me...

what if someone told you
that you could [( take back )]
one single mistake in ur life
mine would be believing that
yOu . eveR . cared . abOut . me

you dont know me...                                      so dont judge what you dont fucking understand

S.O.S.    Save Our Souls

My cigarette's drenched with salty tears because you broke my heart and it quenched my fears.

I'll draw a perfect circle, not a heart, cause I love you just like that.
Forever.

And I'll bring down the heavens,
So we can have bliss.
I'll shoot myself
For one last brush of your lips.

One moment of silence
Two of tears
An infinite of h e a r t b r e a k
Even after all those years
You proved yourself
Just now
When you told me
goodbye
I knew you couldn't l.o.v.e
You're just a little boy
With big man lies

When I see him I have  n o t h i n g  to say.
The urge to kiss him takes my breath away.

Found a box of sharp objects
what a
beautiful thing

 . . t.o. me it look so pretty .b.u.r.n.i.n.g. <33

never like anybody,
>> they will only make you
frown.
never care about anybody,
>> they will only bring you
down.
never trust anybody,
>> they will only tear you
apart.
never love anybody,
>> they will only break your
heart.

sweet catastrOphe

I killed myself from the inside out....</3.

you didn't break my heart,
you killed. A part mended, but
somthing dead cant be
x.o healed..<|3

i love you forever;;is 15 letters. so is;;bullshit;;goodbye.

Broken, bruised, forgotten, sore
- to fucked up to care anymore_

Shes fed up with the way
people treat her she looks up
to the sky and screams
[( enough is enough )]
she falls to her knees and says
goodbye to her life, to everything
she once loved. pull the trigger
and her mask falls to the floor. x3

 walked through the hallway
holding my wrists
hoping no one will see me like this
he looks at me, scared what he'll find
he never thought i had these things in mind
he asks me "...is there any more?"
looking at him with tears in my eyes
i whisper a simple reply   ..what did you think bracelets were for..

unless youve lived my life
[DON`T JUDGE ME .. ]
because you [don`t] ..
[never have] ..
& [never will]
know every little thing about me

TORN & TATTERED
ABUSED & FLATTERED
CRUELY S H A T T E R E D

 

silence is the most powerful cry..

 

i keep
SiLENT
even when i`m
SCREAMiNG
inside .. cause the things that
DRiVE ME CRAZY ..
i have
NO CHOiCE
but to
HiDE
x/3

 

You think you want to die
When in `--realityy
--[Y0U]--[JUST]--[WANT]--[T0]--[BE]--
             `--»[S A V E D]--«3

 

so cut me up like paper
& tape me back into. . .
something beautiful x3

 

..B.e.h.i.n.d.. This ||Smile|| Is Everything You'll Never U n d e r s t a n d...

 

I no what its like to want to die
How it hurts to smile
How you try to fit in
But you can’t
How you hurts yourself on the outside
To kill the thing on the inside

//// the wider smile… the deeper cut \\\\

She wipes the r u n n i n g
[[ mascara ]]
from her eyes
as she whispers to herself
im n.e.v.e.r gonna be good [e][n][o][u][g][h]

i love you forever;;is 15 letters. so is;;bullshit;;goodbye.

She cut more and more
Her arm was now full of lines
Her artistic way of doing with
Instead of complaints and whines

 

these scars on my wrist
are a reminder of
everything you werent

  a new cut;; a new bracelet  

//     i've felt this way for so long       \\
\\ it's like i've forgotten how to be happy //

yeah...
i know its wrong but its [ feels ] so right
so i'll just add
another scar tonight <|3

cut your wrist fake a smile make a fist think awhile

love me gently with a chainsaw

  && take the glass agaisnt

 your wrists. you know i am your

          worst nightmare

oh how you love my

             bloody kiss.

+--^----------,--------,-----,--------^-,
  | |||||||||   `--------''               |      my finger`s on the  T R i G G E R
  `+---------------------------^----------|          &&you`re in my way,,
    `\_,---------,---------,--------------'
      / XXXXXX /'|       /'
     / XXXXXX /  `\    /'                                    < / 3
    / XXXXXX /`-------'
   / XXXXXX /
  / XXXXXX /
(_______(
  `------'

1,377 teenagers become mothers.
1,106 teenage girls get an abortion.
500 adolescents begin using drugs
4,219 teenagers get a sexually transmitted disease.
1,000 adolescents begin drinking alcohol.
3,610 teens are assulted.. 80 are raped.
2,861 teens drop out of school.
420 children are arrested for drug abuse.
5,388 youths are arrested.
6 teens commit suicide.
» .. EVERYDAY

 [ bleed ] the *tears* that I cant [ Cry ] ...

smIle liKe;U juSt DonTgiVe fUcK . .

 

» KiSS MY LiPS AND i`LL CL0SE MY EYES,
» BREAK MY HEART AND i WiLL DiE
.

these s.c.a.r.s on my w.r.i.s.t.s are proof that people like you do exist...

yeah . thats what you are . my favorite scar <|3    h

*its hard to believe I sat

on the bathroom floor

with my bleeding wrists

--à for hours

 

-. what doesnt
.-·' kill yOu
'·-. onLy makez
.-·' you wanna
'·-. die x|3

 

.×I Loved You Once×.
-:|:-I Love You Stil-:|:-
   .I A l w a y s have.
   ||And Always Will||

 

Nobody gets through life
without a scar or a memory *

 

Go on just say it
you need me like a BAD HABBIT z

 

crushes will only crush you.
falling only
hurts
you.
hearts will only
break
u.
if there is no
love
to save you..<3

 

And won't you think I'm pretty
When I'm standing top the
bright lit city

 

p.s. i never changed... I just got tired of pretending to be happy...

 

your the  only one  that makes me
draw stupid hearts in the margins
all over my notebook                 <3

 

He gave her ten roses and said "if you
hold these up to a mirror you will see
eleven of the most beautiful things in the entire world."

do you remember that game " telephone " when
one person would say something and by the
end of the game it was totally different.
|x welcome to highschool x|

the greatest challenge in life ;
is to find someone who knows
all your flaws && differences `
and mistakes yet still loves - - '
everything about you

i don't understand how i can
miss you when i never even had you
& i know i never can...

people say i'm a bad influence ..
i say the world's already fucked up
&& i'm just adding to it.

"you cant find the right person, if your still holding on to the wrong one"

Don`t worry about me,
In the end I will be fine.
I`m just the girl forgotten,
The girl always left behind

and when she breaks down, of course she'll make a sound, but you'll never hear her.

..& sometimes i just
wonder if it was really true...
did youu ever love me
like i loved you?

& shes just a stupid little
girl with her hopes too high
& feelings much too strong
especially for a boy like him

After you’ve been dating a while, you realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend or boyfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privileges & control than you would think. Be careful with it, most people would kill for that kind of power & it can be lost in a nanoseconds

Never let a guy know you like him because
then he knows that whatever he does, you're
still gunna love him & he's gunna mess with
your heart
until it breaks in half

so carry me around like a picture in your pocket
and take me out when things are at their worse;
you can show up at my house completely unanounced
and we can have that movie kiss we talked about

'Whats beautiful?" She asks....he smiles at her and replys..."the moonlight on your hair.....the stars in your eyes...this night in your heart"

they call her for dinner, she makes up a reason. she looks at her arms and rolls down her sleeves. her mother is starting to see thru her lies; and last night her father had tears in his eyes.

i miss all the times we had together, the laughs we had
the times when we thought we couldnt make it through
and the only thing we needed was each other, i miss the
times when we cried on each other shoulders and sayy
"ill always be here for you," but the thing that i miss the
most is saying we would always be friends forever..</3

Men kick friendship around like a football and it doesn`t crack.
Women treat it like glass and it falls to pieces.

How am i supposed to feel about things
i've done? I don't know if i should stay or turn
around and run
. I know that i hurt you. Things
will never be the same. The only love i ever
knew
, I threw it all away..

The best kind of kiss is ;;
the kind when you have to stop
because you can't help but smile.



</3 My Icons

</3 Depressed/Suicide/Cutting

</3 Love



</3 Music/Lyrics



</3 Movies/Tv

</3 Sexy

</3 Other



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